/ Craig Burgess
Say what you do, who it's for and, if there's room, what they get out of it. One plain sentence. Here's a template, some before and after examples, and a five-second test.
Your homepage headline should say what you do, who it’s for, and, if you can squeeze it in, what they get out of it. One plain sentence, with nothing in it anyone has to read twice.
Most businesses cock this up, and they do it on websites that look lovely. Nice fonts and a video playing in the background, and slap bang at the top: “We’re passionate about putting our customers at the centre of everything we do.”
Right. Doing what, exactly?
What’s wrong with most homepage headlines?
They don’t say anything. These are the sort of lines I see every week:
- “Helping businesses grow.”
- “Innovative solutions for modern brands.”
- “Empowering success through strategy.” (My personal favourite.)
- “Bespoke solutions tailored to you.”
- “Award-winning, customer-centric…” and so on until you lose the will.
Any one of those could sit on the website of an accountant, a software company or a bloke who sells sheds. They sound impressive when they’re read out in a meeting, and they mean absolutely nowt to somebody who’s just landed on your site from Google.
It’s like walking into a shop with no signs, and the person behind the counter says “we provide bespoke solutions, would you like one?” One what?
Why does the headline matter so much?
Because people scan websites. They look at the big heading, maybe the sentence under it, and within a few seconds they’ve made their mind up about whether they’re in the right place. If they have to stop and think about what you do, they won’t bother. They’ll go back and click the next result.
And if they can’t tell what you do, the case studies and the design you spent a small fortune on are wasted, because nobody hangs about long enough to see them.
A vague headline costs you in less obvious ways too. You get more enquiries from people who aren’t a fit, and sales calls that start with ten minutes of you explaining what the business does before you get anywhere useful.
How do you write a homepage headline?
Here’s a template you can pinch:
We [do this thing] that [gets this result].
Swap “We” for “I” if it’s just you. It comes out something like “We build websites that turn visitors into customers”, or “I’m an accountant who’ll help you finally hang on to some of your money”. Neither will win a copywriting award. They don’t need to. Somebody reads them and knows straight away whether to stay or go.
A few things that help when you’re filling in the blanks:
- Use the words your customers use. If they’d type “plumber” into Google, say plumber. Nobody searches for “water system specialists”.
- Say where you work if you’re local. “Across Yorkshire” tells half the country to look elsewhere, which is fine, they weren’t going to hire you anyway.
- Bin anything you’d need to explain. Holistic, solutions, synergy, elevate. If it would need a follow-up question down the pub, it’s out.
- Keep it to one sentence. If it’s grown a semicolon, you’ve written two headlines.
Sometimes you don’t even need the result bit. Loads of good headlines just say what the business does and where, and that’s the right place to start if you’re stuck. Get that bit right before you try to be any cleverer.
Shouldn’t a headline lead with the benefits?
This is where people get twitchy. Somebody in the room always asks “isn’t that a bit basic?”, or “can we make it sound more premium?”, or my absolute favourite, “shouldn’t we elevate the language?”
No. You shouldn’t.
Marketing people love telling you to sell the sizzle. Fair enough, benefits have their place. The trouble is, when you open with a benefit before you’ve said what you do, you end up straight back in Generic City. “Grow your business” is a benefit. So is “peace of mind”. I still don’t know if you fix boilers or do payroll.
Say what you do first. If you want to talk about the benefit, the sentence under the headline is a decent place for it.
Homepage headline examples, before and after
These are made up, so don’t go looking for them. They’re the kind of thing I see all the time, though, and the fixes are the kind I’d suggest.
Example: a plumber in Leeds Before: “Excellence in every drop.” After: “Plumbers in Leeds who fix leaks fast.”
Example: an accountant in Sheffield Before: “Your financial future, reimagined.” After: “Accountants for small businesses in Sheffield. We do your books so you don’t have to.”
Example: a software company Before: “Empowering teams to do their best work.” After: “Simple job-tracking software for teams who are sick of spreadsheets.”
Example: a B2B marketing agency Before: “Where strategy meets creativity.” After: “Lead generation for B2B firms that need a steady pipeline.”
Example: a wedding photographer in Barnsley Before: “Capturing moments, creating memories.” After: “Relaxed, natural wedding photography in Barnsley and South Yorkshire.”
None of the “after” versions are clever. Every one of them lets someone opt in or opt out in about a second, which is the whole job.
For what it’s worth, ours currently says “Websites that pay for themselves.” I’ll let you decide whether I’ve followed my own advice.
The five-second test
Open your homepage. Ignore everything apart from the big headline and the sentence under it. Pretend you’ve never heard of your business, and ask yourself:
If I landed here knowing nothing, would I know what this business does within five seconds?
Better still, get somebody who doesn’t know much about your business (a mate, your mum, whoever’s nearest) to look at it for five seconds. Close the laptop and ask them what you do. If they can’t tell you, or they get it wrong, rewrite it. Don’t argue with them about it. They’re right.
If they get it right, ask who they think it’s for. That’s the next thing your homepage has to answer, and there are a few more after that. I’ve gone through what should go on a homepage in a separate post, so I won’t repeat it all here. And if your headline passes and you’re still not getting any enquiries, have a look at why your website might not be getting enquiries.
It’s one sentence and it takes about a minute to fix. I’ve just used over a thousand words to tell you that, which I’m aware is a bit rich.